Blessed to be a Blessing: FX Harsono: Testimonies

Above is the title of art exhibition I attended a few weeks ago. For further information about this exhibition, I recommend visit this website and download the exhibition brochure. It provides a very thorough explanation on his works.

You may also read the newspaper article here.

More on FX Harsono:

This is his official website. And you may see some of his video works here.

FX Harsono is an Indonesian, Chinese descent, Catholic, and was born in Java island. His background is quite similar with mine except that I am Protestant and receive Sundanese influence, while he is Catholic with Javanese influence.

I must say that I can really relate myself to his artworks.

My tears dropped when I watched his documentary, nDudah.
It was totally subconcious. I didn't even have time to hold back my tears. After I realised that I cried, I can't stop even if I wanted to... It is just so unexpected. Lucky not so many people there, but there was a museum officer that noticed and she kept looking at me. Paiseh! :p
I started to cry on the last part of the video when locals Indonesians rescued and took care of some of the Chinese-Indonesians survived from the mass murder. It is, for me, "a glimpse of hope" in the midst of a horrible setting. I sensed hope for unity, love, peace, and most importantly, forgiveness.

But the best artwork displayed that trigger me to reflect deeply is his "Rewriting the Erased".

Here is what the exhibition brochure explain regarding this particular installation:

"In a darkened room, FX Harsono sits at a table with paper, ink, and a brush. Slowly he begins to write his name in Chinese character by character *"The only three Chinese characters that he knows," claimed the curator who guided us*. He repeats this, placing each sheet of paper with the three Chinese characters on the floor, and starts to write on the next sheet, until the entire floor is papered over with his name.

In this poignant and meditative peformance, the artist seeks to remember - reclaim - that which has been lost or erased. Being of Chinese descent in Indonesia meant that Harsono, like many others, was cut off fom his Chinese 'roots' and culture through a series of government policy aimed at fully assimilating Chinese immigrants into Indonesian society. These measures, implemented duing Suharto's New Order regime, included requiring all Chinese immigrants into Indonesian society. These measures, implemented during Suharto's New Order regime, included requiring all Chinese to change their names to Indonesian-sounding ones, as well as the closure of Chinese schools, press and organisations. The end of Suharto's New Order in 1998 witnessed the lifting of these estrictions, and the Chinese wee once again able to use their original names.

During this time, Harsono began to question the seemingly conflicting facets of his identity: Indonesian, Chinese, and Catholic. For most of his life, he had to practice a 'politics of denial' in orde to feel that he belonged somewhere, and this meant the suppression of this 'Chinese' identity. Now that he is free to reconnect with this forgotten, or repressed, aspect of himself, he seems to question, through his work, if that past still holds any significance for him, or is it, when revisited, simply a series of empty and meaningless gestures, taking shape as ideographs from a language and culture that Harsono can only half-understand? The gestures of the artist are filled with both pathos and power, as he attempts to reclaim a past that is at once intensely pesonal as it is politically inflected."

The moment I read the brochure, the first thought that came to my mind was "Wah... it is SO me!"

Anyway, my Chinese name is 蔡秀云 [cài xiù yún]

蔡 [cai] is family name.

秀 [xiu] means
1. adjective [清秀] elegant
2. adjective [优异] outstanding
3. noun talent

云 [yun] means cloud.

It sounds beautiful, I must say, but I didn't know what it means. I just called my Dad to ask about it, but he wasn't at home. So maybe I'll post it later.

I sometimes think whether to let my Chinese name known for people who finds it difficult to pronounce my Indonesian name (in these case my fellow Chinese Singaporean or mainland Chinese colleagues and friends). But I never do that. Not because I rejected my Chinese background, but because I'm afraid that I will ignore people when they call me 秀云 as I'm not used to it!!! :p

Well, I love my Indonesian names, especially my surname. It is interesting how 蔡 was translated to Sulayman. Doesn't make any sense fo me. Lim family translated their name to Salim. Make sense. Tio translated to Tioranu. Make sense. But Cai to Sulayman? I didn't see any connection between both :p
Well.. Sulayman is Indonesian term for Solomon, the king that asked for wisdom. I just realised it when I was 7 years old.
Believe it or not, wisdom is one of the main spritual gifts that I received from GOD. And till today... I always try to live my name... constantly asking GOD to grant me HIS wisdom.

Well, this reflection on identity will be getting more interesting for me as I am planning to go to China this May.
Allow me to quote another article:
"In a 2007 trip to China, FX Harsono found that he was a stranger there too. 'Who am I? When I question one thing about identity, if I find one answer, I find another question. It never stops,' he says...
In spite of the dark episodes he has witnessed and researched, he has never considered living elsewhere. He says: 'I love Indonesia. Even if the situation and the economy is not as good as maybe Singapore, I still love it.' ...
He adds: 'In Indonesia, I get a lot of inspiration for art. If I move to other countries that are more comfortable, maybe I won't get such inspiration?'" :)